Sometimes the woman whose acrylic nails are popping off while she’s having insanely loud sex in a rent-by-the-hour motel room with mirrored ceilings and headboard is not a prostitute, but a 20-something, who lives at home with her only living parent who is terminally ill, and she has chosen to give up (most) of her social life to care for him. She choses to have sexual encounters in motel rooms during daylight hours because it feels safer, and she doesn’t want to disrupt (or disrespect) her ill father.
Sometimes the boy standing near the street corner pretending to walk his dog (that you are sure is selling drugs) to the pretty girl who meets him there at dusk, isn’t a dealer, but a straight-A student whose family members are fundamentalists and would kick him out of their home, exiling him from their hearts (and what they know of God’s, too), if they knew he had a girlfriend and was thinking of kissing her before marriage. You don’t want to know what they’d do if he told them that he had figured out he was bisexual or fluid or pansexual. Trust me.
Sometimes the mother who is worried about her daughter’s interracial dating has a valid reason. Sometimes it’s her own trauma from the past getting tangled up in her daughter’s present. Sometimes when she says, “I know they’re sexy; I know they’re all damn sexy. I’d want to sleep with them, too. I do want to sleep with them, too,” she’s telling the absolute truth. And when she leans close to say, “But I’m scared you’re not safe with him,” she’s also being truthful.
Sometimes we say that others can’t judge from the otutside, that they have no right, no understanding, no perspective. Sometimes, they do. Sometimes, it’s not their business. Sometimes, they’re doing it out of sheer love (or what they believe to be love–and while that doesn’t necessarily make it okay or right or justified, it can make it easier to understand). We are all human, after all. We have oh-so-breakable, breakable, hearts. Sometimes things are not as they seem.
What are some of your sometimes stories?
a. eve
Pansexual sensate aesthete. Proponent of resources and eduction to help us each live our best lives. Kinky, quirky, sex-obsessed, sex toy-obsessed, sexpos critical theory slut with a passion for writing & def an acquired taste. Interests: The loveliness of everything being lovely. Wearing stars in the night sky. Buddhism. Critical Theory. Embodiment. Authentic Connection. Preparing happy, humming food. Baking bread from scratch. Thunderstorms. Storytelling. Sharing. Old typewriters. Dangly earrings.
If you enjoyed this article, please consider sharing it!
8 Responses to Sometimes
Leave a Reply
18+ Please!
This web site contains Adult Content and Language. Please do not continue reading if you are not 18+ years of age. (Or 21+ where 18 is not the legal age of majority.) Thank you.
Follow Us!
Grab my Button!
Sponsors
Kyra, Sometimes that man who is drunk & disheveled has a world of courage that none of us can see because we are blinded by judgment and hate. Sometimes the neighbors who opened their door and hearts are angels in disguise to the unknowing. But some of us know. Those of us that have sometimes stories know. Those of us that read sometimes stories know. We know the truth right now, even if we’re bound to forget it in some moments. The important thing is that we share the sometimes stories when we remember what’s really important. Thank you. Ever so much.
Mistress Arabella´s last [type] ..Bless Me Father… For I Keep Sinning
Mistress Arabella´s last [type] ..Bless Me Father… For I Keep Sinning
Michelle, Sometimes, the woman who has a lover and is trying to leave him to set an example for her children IS stronger than she believes. Sometimes, she has a reserve of strength inside of her that is brighter than the stars and bigger than the storms. Sometimes, she is the most powerful creature on the earth, and it when it comes to survival–to protecting herself and her children, to advocating for her needs and her childrens’–she will be able to do absolutely anything to LIVE. That woman will be free. She will unchain herself and her children. She will show herself and her children a different life, a different way of being, a lighter way, a way that is truer to the heart. She can do it. And she has everything she needs right inside herself. xoxox
Artist of Doom, thank you for your comment. It’s so true that everyone has the potential to surprise us with their intellect and kindness. Thank you for sharing your experience with us all, and reminding us about the benefits we can reap when we don’t “judge a book by its cover.” Blissful blessings to you…
Sometimes the man showing up at your neighbor’s house in the middle of the night, staggering, drunk and disheveled, isn’t the man your neighbor is having an affair with. He’s a longtime friend who finally found the courage to come out to his parents and friends – only to be rejected and spat on. Your neighbor may be the one friend who stuck by him, loved him no matter what and is trying to give him somewhere safe to begin remaking his life and reality.
Sometimes the woman who has a lover is trying to leave him. She is trying to convince herself that she is stronger than this. That she doesn’t need this other person in her life to question, to wonder about, to love. She is trying to be a good example for her children. To instill in them a sense of enough self esteem to find the person who will accept them unconditionally so that they don’t need to find another on the side, someone else to fill a need, a void that can become all-consuming.
this “Sometimes” was a very nice read. when i was younger, had several girlfriends that were Exotic Dancers that i met through a friend of mine’s (who was the bouncer) girlfriend. they were the nicest, smartest people i knew so i kind of stayed in that loop for 10 to 15 years. it’s kind of sad but now that i’m older, can’t go back for fear of creeping any of the younger girls out plus never enjoy the experience of being a “customer” (their judgement of me)… needless to say, this has taught me to Never Judge a Book By it’s Cover or not Rush into Judging Anybody Else as I would not appreciate being judged…
Ms. Candyland, Thank you so much for your comment. I’ve been crying since I posted this (true story), reflecting on all of the funhouse mirrors in life of distorted perception, the judgments I sometimes so readily (all too readily) make on others, and those that are made on me. I wanted to make a statement about that. I wanted to show that we have soft, vulnerable hearts. And I was waiting, too, for someone to reach back, and share another “sometimes story.” Activism begins with dialogue. It changes hearts. And it breathes new life. Again, thank you…
Sometimes the woman taking her clothes off in the strip club is not there just because she likes to take her clothes off in public and have dollar bills shoved in her g-string. Those dollar bills are paying for the babysitter so she can go to college and get her degree. This is beautiful Mistress Arabella. Thank you for reminding us all to think about our perceptions and judgements. Not everything is what it seems. xoxo